If you’re a loyal Keeping Abreast reader, then you’ll know I haven’t been blogging as much. I’m taking some space to breathe. To reflect on how I want to live my life which in large part includes my business.

Thank you Brené Brown for leading by example and giving the rest of us permission to disappear for a while. Brene is taking a three-month sabbatical, a break in podcasting and social media, and making sure her team takes time away too. She quotes actress, screenwriter, director, and producer Michaela Coel:

I’ve been at this since 2015. As a solo business owner, I do everything. There are so many roles I fulfill on a daily basis from designer to shipper/receiver to bookkeeper. And daily means 7 days a week and often late into the night. I’m not complaining…well…maybe I am just a little.

I love the freedom of owning my own business. And, I’m also freakin’ tired, to put it bluntly. The last 2 years have really brought this to light as it has for all of us. The isolation and lack of face-to-face, hug-to-hug connection has weighed heavily. There’s no energy.

So, I’m taking some time and space to be quiet and listen…to me. The me I was before the world, the marketers, and social media told me what I should be, and what I need to do to get there. It’s exhausting.

I don’t know where I’ll land. However, I do know I can’t continue on the way I have been for the last 7 years. And, I do know my business can’t continue on in its current form. Changes need to come. What will those changes be? I can’t fully answer that yet.

The grit I’ve relied on to establish and grow a clothing manufacturing business from nothing to what it is today is something I’m proud of. To receive an online order from a total stranger on the other side of the country and then hear how much they love my clothes and what I’m doing, is still mind-blowing to me. Someone is wearing something I’ve made. It makes my heart swell with gratitude and love.

But, now I feel the grit has become a grind. I’m grinding it out everyday and it’s not bringing me joy.

Brené Brown talks about grit vs grind with Glennon Doyle in Episode 49 of the We Can Do Hard Things podcast. “Grit: This is about me. This is not working. I’m letting this go. I’m changing course. Grind is externally focused. What will people think? People who have a ton of grit, walk away from stuff often.”

Also, Emily and Amelia Nagoski helped me understand where I am with this quote:

The reality is how do I compete with the Amazons of the world, with free shipping, and production costs that are a fraction of what I can produce garments for here in Canada.

In as much as we, me included, want to support local, ethical, sustainable products and businesses, at the end of the day, it comes down to money. With the rising cost of housing, fuel, food, shipping, the list goes on, clothing is optional, a luxury. I get it.

I’ve always been open and transparent with you my customers, subscribers, and supporters. So, I wanted to let you know what’s up. I’m still here and I still have new designs coming out. Please check out my new bamboo leggings and lounge pants.

Whatever happens, and however me and my business look going forward, I thank you. Thank you for continuing to be here.

Until next time,

~ Colleen

I’m a recovering Chartered Accountant and Breast Cancer Champion turned Fashion Designer. My COKANNA Canadian-made bamboo clothing is all about comfort and style. Giving back to the community is important to me so I support Rethink Breast Cancer‘s metastatic breast cancer education, support, and advocacy work